Wednesday, November 17, 2010

The ultimate guide rig

Although you don't see as many guides using them as you would think, it's hard to argue against the fact that a Suburban is the ultimate guide vehicle.  It comfortably holds a mountain of gear, 2 clients, rods completely set up, and you can sleep in the back when your wife/significant other kicks you out. Although the shiny new suburbans are sweet with dvd players and onstar and 22" rims, my buddy Tyler has the ultimate guide rig: A 1978 camo suburban.
The Shuttle drivers should pay you to drive this sweet ride!
Thanks to some car problems this fall I was able to spend about a week guiding out of the Suburban, and it was sweet.  Once I got her fired up, the CD player kicked on Lynard Skynard's Sweet Home Alabama  started blaring which was the perfect soundtrack for this rig.  In the back of the Suburban, next to a sub-woofer with a trout cutout in the side, there was a cliff bugger barn loaded with nasty home rolled streamers.  Of course when you drive a camo suburban, all you do is throw streamers!  Here are a couple more of the benefits of fishing out of a camo suburban.

Instant respect from clients:  If you are fishing with new people there is always a moment of uncertainty from them about your personality/abilities/etc.  When you say "Hey, I'll help you grab your gear, I'm parked over there with the Camo Suburban" they instantly know that you are legit, and any uncertainties are gone.

"What happens on the Bighole, stays on the Bighole"
Roll down rear window with aftermarket rod holders:  There's no worrying about your rod holder's suction cup failing and 4 grand worth graphite hitting the freeway when you have PVC tubing, a rope and bungey cords screwed into the roof of your suburban.  Combined with the roll down rear window is a perfect rod system.
10 footers?  No Big Deal!
Pimp my ride quality attention to detail:  The all camo paint job makes sure that you are not missed on your way to the river, but it's the small attention to detail that you notice when you are driving.  The suburban has functional accessory like the heavy duty floor mats that protect the stylish carpet or the bungey cord that keeps the 4-wheel drive lever in place.  Some of the finer points are not quite as function and nothing says class like the door lock, which would make Hugh Heffner himself proud.  The playboy lock is a symbol to the amount of partying that this ultimate guide rig has been involved in.
I don't know where he found this, but in 1978 it was probably standard equipment.


  1. My goodness dont fall on the playboy stick!!
    cool ride!

  2. Even if they're full-sized, you can fit more than two clients into a Suburban, Joe. Three comfortably for sure. And if they're substandard issue, a fourth. With room for the milk crate.

  3. I read this early and I was laughing my ass off. I can see you rocking the Skynard pulling out of the roost. Sweet rig. I love the old 'burbans. Good stuff Joe.


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